Bad Girls Do Get Eaten
by MrBillyD
Summary: In a Beverly Hills 90210AngelBuffy crossover, Bad Girl Valery is killed by Spike, returns as a vampire, and is then suspected, in the vampire killing of Kelly Taylor.
1. Chapter 1

Bad Girls Do Get Eaten

Here is a Beverly Hills 90210/Angel crossover story.

Spike the vampire, kills "Bad Girl" Valerie, turning her into a vampire. She is then suspected in the vampire murder of Kelly Taylor.

I do not own any of the characters in this story. They belong to the Producers of the Shows "Beverly Hills 90210" and "Angel".

Bad Girls Do Get Eaten

By MrBillyD

1

My name is Valerie Malone. According to the Beverly Beat, a local newsletter, I'm "The 24 year old, dark haired, sexy part owner, of the Beverly Hills nightclub; 'Peachpit AfterDark.'"

We serve drinks, and we have live entertainment on the weekends. On weeknights, David Silver is in the D/J booth.

Around 9 P.M. on a Tuesday night, business was slow. Less than half the tables were occupied. The recorded music blared, but not loud enough to drown out any conversation.

I was seated at the bar, going over some paperwork, when a guy sat on the stool beside me.

"Evenin' Valerie luv." He spoke with an English Cockney accent. "Can I buy you somethin' to drink?"

He was Spike; a mean looking dude in a black leather jacket. He had a firm build and curly, white hair: A retro, punk rocker, Sid Vicious wannabe look. He'd been showing up almost every night, for the past two weeks, with a ditzy blonde chic named Harmony. She also had a mean look to her, but neither of them had caused any trouble. Tonight he was alone.

"Thank you Spike." I told him, "Maybe you haven't heard, but I'm part owner of the Club. I'm the one who buys drinks for customers. Not the other way around."

"Then I'll have my usual."

I said, "That was slick, but you're the one, who has to pay for the drinks first."

Then I asked, "So where's your girlfriend, what's her name? Harmony?"

"She's on ice."

"'On ice'?" I said scornfully, "You mean you haven't broken up with her, but you're now on the prowl?"

"That's partly correct."

"What part?"

"When I said 'She's on ice', I meant that literally. Right now she's hanging upside down and naked, inside a freezer, with the lights off."

I laughed. "If that's what dating you leads to, forget it. I don't mind a little bit kinky, but risking death..."

"That wasn't a joke luv."

"Yeah. Right."

"You see, our employer doesn't take any lip, from any of their employees."

"Don't you think that's kind of excessive? Every now and then, I have to give somebody a good talking to, and that's enough."

"We are employed by the law firm Wolfram and Hart. Our employer enforces Company rules, in a way that we employees never forget."

I said, "Law firm? You don't look like a lawyer to me; and Harmony just doesn't seem like someone, who could pass any kind of a bar exam."

"Harm and I aren't lawyers." He told me, "She and I enforce company policy, in a way that our clients never forget."

I said, "Enforcers?"

He said, "Wolfram and Hart wants me to explain Company policy to you Ms. Malone, in a way you'll never forget."

I looked at Spike's face. That night he looked more than mean. He looked dangerous.

I told him, "You get out of here right now, or I'll call the police."

"Go ahead." He told me, "I'm sure they'll be interested to learn about the time, when you pretended to be pregnant by a married man, who you had a fling with. You then got him to pay for a fake abortion, along with hush money.

"The law calls that fraud and blackmail, for which you can do an unhealthy amount of jail time."

I told him, "You can't prove that."

"Wolfram and Hart can, along with providing evidence of your involvement in a murder."

"Murder?"

"Maybe more than one."

"What's this all about?"

"We know for a fact, that you allow gambling and drug dealing inside this club, with you getting a percentage of every transaction."

"Oh I see." I said, "And your employer wants a percentage too."

"Meet me outside, in the parking lot, in 15 minutes," he said, "and be sure you come alone."

15 minutes later I was out in the parking lot, with a loaded pistol in my handbag. Spike stood beside a car, at the dark end of the parking lot, furthest from the street. I came over to him.

He opened the front door on the passenger side, and told me, "Get in."

"Forget it Mr. Tough Guy. I'm not getting in a car with you."

"All right cautious lady." He shut the door. "Stand there."

"Good enough." I told him. "Now tell me what's the deal."

"You're a very bad girl Valerie." He said, "I come from Sunnydale, which is full of very bad girls."

"Sunnydale? Vampire Town?"

"And do you know what happens to very bad girls in Sunnydale?"

"I've heard that they get killed and eaten by vampires."

He said, "Exactly."

Suddenly his arms were around me. He pulled me up against himself, and put his mouth against my neck. He had a pair of sharp, heavy fangs, which he stabbed inside my neck.

Then my mind vanished.


	2. Chapter 2

2

I opened my eyes. I was stretched out lengthwise, across the backseat of a moving car. My dress was a wrinkled mess; its skirt was pushed up around my hips, and my legs were spread wide. It was still dark outside the windows.

I began to groan. I was in pain, from the top of my head, to the tips of my toes, and everything in between. I had the hangover from Hell; and I mean that literally.

I heard a woman speak, from the front passenger seat. "She's awake Spike."

I mumbled, "Repent you sinners."

I slipped off the back seat, onto the floor, and grunted loudly. Then I put my hand on the seat, and began to pull myself up. I was feeling great pain. I also felt very groggy and nauseous, like I was about to throw up.

I said, "Stop the car! I'm about to puke!"

The car pulled to the side and stopped. I fell back. My head rested against the left rear door. The door opened. I turned myself over, poked my head outside, and everything in my stomach came barfing out.

Then the door shut and we were moving again. I got up to a sitting position in the back seat. I smoothed out my dress so my skirt covered my legs, to its full length. Spike was driving. Harmony sat beside him. I was still groggy, and in pain. Now I also felt hungry.

I muttered. "I'm hungry. I want to kill somebody. Drink his blood."

Harmony turned around. She said, "I know how you feel Val; but we can't allow that."

She handed me an open thermos and said, "Here's some of the good stuff. Have some of your own back."

"Some of my own?" I put the mouth of the thermos under my nose, and smelled the warmed up liquid inside. "My own blood?"

"That's right." She told me. "We can't have a brand new vampire going off the deep end, and biting the first live person she sees. Once we get to where we're going, there'll be enough pigs blood to fill you up. Then you'll be able to control your bloodlust."

I poured the contents out of the thermos, into its lid-cup, and gulped it all down. I drank down several cups of my own blood. Then I no longer felt hungry, or groggy. My mind cleared.

I repeated, "Once we get to where we're going? Where are we going?"

Now Spike spoke. "Wolfram and Hart's Headquarters love. That's where everything'll be explained to you."

I looked out the window. We were driving through the dark, almost deserted streets of downtown L.A. I checked my wristwatch. It was 2:37 AM.

I looked myself over. My maroon colored dress was wrinkled from top to bottom, and the skirt had a large dark stain down the front.  
"Spike!" I asked, "Did you rape me?"

He said nothing. He and Harmony faced straight ahead.

I repeated, "Did you?"

He didn't turn his head. "You can't rape a dead woman."

Then I asked, "What'd you fuck a corpse?"

Harmony called out, "Hey Val! Watch your mouth!"

"Well what did he do, after he killed me?"

Now Harmony said, "Spike's not a rapist Val. He's a seducer."

"Yeah--right!" I spoke with scorn. "He's a real Mr. Charm, isn't he?"

We arrived at Wolfram and Hart Headquarters. Spike parked in the Company's basement garage. Then he, Harmony and I took the elevator up to the 38th floor.

Inside the elevator, there was a full length mirror to the right. I looked at it, and saw my dress all wrinkled. Its skirt was stained with blood and semen. My hair was also a mess.

"Spike." I said, "Whether you call it raped or seduced, I look like I've been ravished."

He said nothing. Neither did Harmony. I didn't see either of their reflections in the mirror.

When we reached the 38th floor, Harmony escorted me to a ladies room, where I cleaned myself up, as best I could. I fixed my hair as neat as I could. Then Harmony went outside, and came back in a few minutes, with a clean yellow dress that was just about my size. My overall appearance was barely presentable.

I said, "I can see my reflection in the mirror, but I can't see yours, and I couldn't see Spike's."

"That's how it is with us vampires." she said. "No one's ever been able to figure out why."

Then we went back out into the corridor, where Spike was waiting. He and Harmony escorted me to a small office.

Inside the office, a guy in a suit, in his late twenties, sat behind a desk, with his back to a window, overlooking the lights of the City. He was alive, with blood flowing through his veins.

If Harmony hadn't given me that blood to drink, it would have been impossible for me not to bite him, and suck out his blood, 'til he died. Now I had my bloodlust under control, but I just couldn't help looking hungrily at his very appetizing neck, and licking the tips of my brand new fangs.

"How do you do Miss Malone." He said, "My name is Lindsey McDonald. I see that you are now a vampire."

"Yeah!" I snapped, "Thanks to Spike! He killed me, and I went straight to Hell! Then he, or maybe Harmony, had some kind of kinky sex with my corpse."

"Me?" Harmony laughed. "What do think, I'm some kind of lesbo necrophile? Even if I was, how could I have spurted semen, all over you?"

Lindsay McDonald asked, "You went to Hell?"

"That's right." I told him, "I was killed by a vampire, and I went straight to Hell. I've been a very bad girl, who's done very bad things; and we very bad girls who do very bad things, really do go to Hell. We go directly to Hell. We do not pass 'Go'. We do not collect $200; so repent you sinners."

Mr. McDonald chuckled. Then he said, "Repentance is not encouraged at Wolfram and Hart Miss Malone."

"That's obvious." I said, "It's also obvious that I was more than just Spike's evening meal and kinky toy. If that's all I was, I wouldn't be here. I might not even be undead. Now what the hell do you people want?"

"We want your cooperation Miss Malone. We know all about the unlawful goings on at your place of business. It's very profitable, but very risky. Wolfram and Hart would like to eliminate the risk."

"I see." I said, "You want us pay you to protect our patrons and employees from people like Spike; so what happened to me won't happen to any of them."

"Exactly, and don't forget the Police. You don't want trouble with them either do you?"

"Okay Mr. Mcdonald." I said, "Let's get to the point. How much do you want?"

Harmony laughed, "How much to you got?"

I said, "Fuck that!"

"Relax Miss Malone." The man behind the desk said, "Harmony's joking. I'm sure that something reasonable can be worked out between you and Wolfram and Hart."

"Oh I'm ready to be reasonable," I told him "but I'm not the only one you'll have to deal with. I have a partner. Dylan McKay.

Lindsey McDonald said, "Dylan McKay? Son of the late Jack McKay, and heir to who knows how many secret overseas bank accounts?"

"That's him." I told them, "And a much bigger payoff, than you'd ever get out of my share from the After Dark."

Harmony asked, "How big?"

"Big enough," I told them, "for each of us to live comfortably, for as long as we remain undead."


	3. Chapter 3

3

Three nights later, I entered the AfterDark, about a half-hour after sunset, carrying a six pack of bottled pigs' blood, in a brown paper shopping bag. There were only a handful of customers, all seated at the bar.

David Silver was setting things up in the D/J booth. He looked at me angrily. I figured that was because I'd been away for three days, and been unable to send any messages to anybody. I waved at him. He shook his head, and returned to work.

At that hour, only one waitress was on duty. She looked at me uneasily, and greeted me without smiling. "Good evening Miss Malone."

I figured she was angry with me too, for the same reason as David.

"Hi Yolanda." I said, thinking that the sexy Mexican Girl's neck, was very appetizing, and I'd have just loved, to try out my new fangs on her; but I had no trouble restraining myself.

I've got my bloodlust under control, I thought. Nobody I know has to find out I'm a vampire.

I went into my office in the back, and shut the door. I put the pint bottles of blood in a knee-high fridge that I keep in one corner. Then I locked the fridge. Harmony had got the six pack for me. She said it was pigs' blood. I decided to take her word on that. She also said that if I warmed up one pint a week, in my office's microwave, I could survive on that. I hoped so.

On the other hand, Yolanda did have a very appetizing neck. Come to think of it, so did David, and Donna, and Dylan, and Steve and Claire, and Brandon, and Miss Kelly Taylor.

I sat behind my desk and thought, Kelly Taylor? Hmmm? Ahhh!

No! Forget it! I'd just spent the last three days, learning how to handle the urge to kill people and drink their blood. I'd also learned when and where to go hunting. Harmony had told me of certain places in Mexico, where vampires can go, to safely satisfy their bloodlust; so while Yolanda's neck would be safe from my fangs, I'd still have a good number of necks in Mexico to choose from.

What I didn't have was any idea, of how to get Dylan McKay to pay protection money to Wolfram and Hart.

I also had no idea of where Dylan McKay was. The last time that any of us had heard about him was six months earlier. Brandon Walsh had received a letter from his sister Brenda. She'd said that Dylan, the true love of her life, was with her in London. He'd stayed with her about two months. After that none of us had heard anything from or about him.

I'd told Harmony about him. She and I had been seated in the Wolfram and Hart Cafeteria, having a lunch of warmed up blood, in porcelain mugs. She'd said we were drinking "The good stuff."

That was when I'd told her, "Dylan's spent an average of two months with every girlfriend he's ever had. Before he was with Brenda, he spent two months with her best friend, a bitch named Kelly Taylor. Kelly's other true love, is Brenda's twin brother Brandon."

Harmony laughed and shook her head. "I don't believe it. Haven't any of you ever heard of 'Stand by your man'?"

I told her, "That's how it usually is, among me and my friends in Beverly Hills. It's hard to keep track of who's fucking who. Kelly Taylor, David Silver, Steve Sanders, and Brandon Walsh, all seem to have an endless number of partners; who they ditch after two months or so. Like it's some kind of game.

Harmony the vampire said, "That's a very cruel game. When I kill someone I'm quick, so my victims don't suffer for long. Don't you have any friends, who aren't crueler than me?"

"Oh yes. Donna Martin is a very nice girl. She doesn't want to play games; but she's always ending up with those same kind of Beverly Hills type guys, who aren't capable of any long lasting relationship.

"You know what I'm thinking Harmony? I'm thinking that if I ever do become a practicing vampire, I can benefit the entire community, by killing them off. If I did, Donna's the only one I wouldn't bite. No. She's the one who I'd kill first, and then bring back as a "very nice girl" vampire. Then she and I can take turns at killing Kelly, David, Steve, Brandon, and Dylan; and not bring any of them back. All of L.A. would be better off."

Harmony said, "Forget that! Here in L.A. a novice like you shouldn't bite anyone, until you know who the people you should watch out for are."

I'd said, "Then tell me who they are."

She'd said, "The police obviously. There are also some street gangs that hunt vampires, and mostly there's Angel Investigations."

She'd told me that, while I was still a Wolfram and Hart Headquarters.

Now back at the AfterDark, there was a knock on my office door.

I called out, "Come on in!"

David Silver entered the office. He looked angry, and he was also very distressed.

He spoke sharply. "Where the hell've you been Val?"

I said, "Nice to see you too David."

He shouted, "Where were you?"

I told him, "I became a vampire on Tuesday night; and I've just spent the last three days, learning to control my bloodlust; so I won't kill you, for talking to me like that!"

"Why are you joking about it Val? That's really sick!"

I asked, "What's the matter?"

"Oh. You haven't heard?"

"Heard what?"

"It's Kelly. She's dead."

"Kelly?"

"They found her body this morning. In the backseat of her car, right outside in the parking lot. My stepsister Kelly Taylor, was killed last night, by a vampire."

Talk about mixed emotions.

I made sure that my fangs were very firmly retracted.

Then I said, "Oh David! That's awful! A vampire? I apologize for the joke. I swear I didn't know."

"The police said they found a pair of deep bite marks in her neck, and she was drained of blood. They want to talk to you Val."

"Me? Why? If it's a vampire..."

"Just routine questioning. Just in case you've seen anyone around here who's been acting suspicious. They told me that known vampires have been seen hanging out here. You know that English guy Spike, and his girlfriend Harmony?"

I said, "They're vampires?"

Then I asked, "How do they know that? Who identified them?"

"An employee of a private security agency. Angel Investigations. One of their people was here today. A black guy named Charles Gunn. He said they know how to deal with vampires. He also said that in case we'd like their help, you should contact them. He left their card."

David reached in his shirt pocket, took out a business card and handed it to me. The card had a picture of a poorly drawn angel, beside the name Angel Investigations; along with their address and phone number.

I said, "'In case we need help'? Now he tells us? They knew that vampires were in here, but they didn't say anything, 'til after Kelly was dead? If they want us to hire them forget it. I'm sure I can get help from another Agency that's actually competent."

I picked up a telephone book on my desk, and leafed through it until I came to Security Agencies. There must have been hundreds listed.

I slapped the book shut.

I said, "I don't know what I'm looking for David."

He told me, "Charles Gunn asked me to call, as soon as you came in. Like it or not, someone from Angel Investigations is on his way here right now, so he can talk to you."


	4. Chapter 4

4 

David went out the door, leaving me seated alone at my office desk. He came back immediately.

"Spike and Harmony are here." he said. "Do you want to call the police?"

I told him, "No. Let me see if I can talk to them first. I don't want police cars outside two nights in a row. It'll be bad for business."

I got up from behind my desk, walked past David, went through the doorway and out into the Club.

It was still early. The customers were few. Yolanda stood beside the bar, speaking softly in Spanish, to Jorge the bartender. They were nervously watching Spike and Harmony, who were seated in a booth. They both had martinis in front of them.

I came over to the booth.

I spoke softly. "You two shouldn't be here."

Spike said, "Good evening to you too Valerie."

"Listen." I told them, "Do you remember, I told you about Kelly Taylor?"

Harmony said, "Yeah. 'The big blonde bitch'."

I made a hushing sound.

"Don't say that." I told Harmony. "She was killed last night. Right outside in the parking lot. By a vampire."

Harmony smiled. She whispered. "Well hooray for you girl. Your very first kill."

"No. Don't say that. Someone from Angel Investigations identified both of you to the police. They could be on their way here right now."

Spike said, "Someone from Angel Investigations is here ahead of them."

He looked toward the bar and said, "Cordelia."

Harmony also said, "Cordelia." in unison with him.

A black haired woman around my age was seated at the bar, dressed in a stylish white business outfit. She had a matching handbag set down beside her glass of red wine. She'd been in the Club a few times before, escorted by an English guy named Wesley. Unlike Spike, Wesley spoke with an upper class English accent. Tonight she was alone.

When Spike and Harmony spoke the name; the woman turned and looked in our direction. Then she got up off the stool and came over to us. As she approached us, she reached inside her zipped open handbag, and kept her hand there.

Spike and Harmony both got tense. I hoped they wouldn't display their fangs.

The woman came up to the table.

Harmony said, "Hi Cordy. How're things going with you and Angel?"

She said, "Good evening Harm, Spike, and hello...I don't know your name."

"I'm Valerie Malone." I told her, "I'm the manager here, and I don't want any trouble."

"Nobody ever does," said Cordelia, "but you had plenty last night. A Miss Kelly Taylor was killed by a vampire, who was probably one of you three."

"Us three?" I said, "I'm not a vampire."

"I come from Sunnydale Miss Malone, just like Harmony; who was a friend of mine when she was alive. I am also a friend of Buffy Summers, the Vampire Slayer herself. When I attended Sunnydale High, I was part of the Slayer's inner circle; so I know a vampire when I see one."

Spike said, "Well you're not seeing the killer of Kelly Taylor standing here. All of us've only been drinking pig's blood."

Harmony said, "That's all I've had. How about you Val?"

I looked Cordelia straight in the eye and said, "I didn't kill Kelly Taylor."

She asked me, "Did you vamp her?"

"I said I didn't!"

"If she was vamped," Cordelia said, "then when she comes back undead, she'll be able to tell us who her killer was."

I told her, "I said I don't want trouble Cordelia. Now I'm asking you to leave."

"Very well Miss Malone. I'll be leaving now; but like the Governor of our great State said, 'Ahl be bahk', and I won't be alone."

I told her, "Neither will I. Hasta la vista, behbeh."

Cordelia turned around and went out the door.

Harmony said, "I don't know how she does it. Cordy's been working for Angel the vampire, for the last two years, and she's still alive? If I had a hunk like him for a boss, and with her looks, my life expectancy would have been one week at the most."

Now Spike said, "Did you vamp her Valerie? Will she be able to I.D you?"

"No." I repeated, "I didn't kill Kelly Taylor."

He asked, "Do you have any idea who did?"

"Wasn't it one of you?"

Harmony asked, "Why would we? I know you couldn't stand her, but what motive would we have?"

I said, "I told you that Kelly Taylor was the second great love of Dylan McKay's life. By killing her, you've made certain, that he'll return to Beverly Hills."

"Good idea." She said, "I wish I'd thought of that. You're gonna make one really good vampire Val."

The door opened, and Steve Sanders entered. Tonight he looked grim. He came over to me.

"Hi Valerie." He said, "It really sucks about Kelly, doesn't it?"

I heard Harmony snicker.

"Hi Steve." I said, "Don't say 'suck'. David might think it's a vampire joke, and he's in an irrational rage."

Steve said, "Who isn't?"

I asked, "Has anyone heard from Dylan?"

"Yeah. Brandon got an E-mail from Brenda this morning. She said that she and Dylan would be taking the next flight. We'll probably see them both in the morning."

I said, "So they're together again?"

"I don't know. All I know is what I told you. That's what Brandon told me."

Steve went over to the Bar, where he joined David, who was speaking with Jorge and Yolanda. They all turned and looked at me, Spike and Harmony.

Spike said, "Val's right Harmony. Time for us to split."

My two new vampire friends got up and went out the door fast.

David and Steve hurried over to me.

David said, "What'd you do? You let them go?"

I said, "What do you mean, 'Let them go'? What was I supposed to do? Arrest them? I'm not a cop. I told them I don't want any more trouble here. They said they didn't either; and now there won't be."


	5. Chapter 5

5

About a half-hour later, I was back in my office, catching up on some paperwork at my desk, when there was another knock on my door.

I called out, "Come in!"

A guy entered my office. He was in his forties. He wore a rumpled, unbuttoned, light brown raincoat, and smoked a cigar. He seemed to be cross-eyed, and he walked stooped forward.

"Good evening Miss Malone." He said, "My name's Lieutenant Columbo. I'm with the Police."

I said, "Good evening Lieutenant."

"I have to ask you a few questions, about the unfortunate vampire killing, of a Miss Kelly Taylor that took place outside of here last night."

I said, "Please be seated Lieutenant."

He sat beside the desk, in a chair to my left, and put the cigar in an ashtray. Then he took out a writing pad and a pen.

I told him, "I'm sorry I can't help you Lieutenant, but I wasn't here last night. I was away for three days, and I didn't return until about an hour ago. That was the first time I heard about Kelly."

He started scribbling notes in the pad.

He said, "Now that's what I have to clear up Miss Malone. Excuse me, but where were you, and what were you doing, these past three days?"

I looked straight at him and said, "I was in Mexico Lieutenant. I was with a guy, having a fling."

He scribbled again.

"A fling in Mexico?"

"That's right. We were in Puerto Vallarta. We stayed at the Hotel Playa Los Arcos. We did not sign our real names."

He scribbled something every time I spoke.

"What was his real name?"

"He didn't say. He said I should call him Spike."

"Spike? Excuse me Miss Malone, but a vampire named Spike is suspected in the killing of Miss Taylor."

"We'll he obviously couldn't have been the one I was with, could he?"

The Lieutenant said, "The one we're interested in, was in here before, and you were seen talking to him."

"He's the one who was with me in Mexico. I had sexual relations with him; and from what I've heard, when a male vampire becomes sexually aroused, his fangs become extended along with his..."

"That's' what I've heard too."

"So if he'd been a vampire, I wouldn't have got up from that bed alive;" I chuckled, "but what a way to go."

He said, "This is all very interesting Miss Malone; but do you have any idea where I can contact this Spike, so I can verify your story?"

"Yes Lieutenant. He said he works at Wolfram and Hart Corporation Headquarters."

"Wolfram and Hart? Very well Miss Malone. Thank you for your help."

He put the writing pad and pen back in his pocket.

"Always glad to help L.A.'s finest."

Lieutenant Columbo picked up his cigar from the ashtray. He stood up, and headed to the door. Then he halted, and turned around.

"Oh by the way Miss Malone. Just one more thing, before I forget. You said that when you checked into this Hotel Playa Los Arcos, you didn't use your real names. What names did you use?"

"I said my name was Kelly Taylor. He gave his name as Dylan McKay. That was supposed to be a harmless joke. Ironic isn't it?"

"Yes." the detective nodded. "Tragically ironic."

Then he was gone.

Around midnight, the Club was as crowded as you'd expect, on a Friday night. David was in the D/J Booth, playing the usual music. He'd hardly said a word over the P.A. Donna was beside him. She was the one trying to cheer everybody up, doing most of the spiel that night herself. Steve and Brandon were at a table. Neither of them had much to say either.

I didn't know if any undercover cops were in the Club that night; but the bookies and the dealers had enough sense not show up.

David, Donna, Steve and Brandon had each asked me where I'd been the last three days. I told them the same thing I'd told the Lieutenant. "I was in Puerto Vallarta Mexico, getting laid. Just a fling. Getting my rocks off."

They didn't ask me anything further.

I was seated alone at a cocktail table, when I saw Dylan approaching me through the crowd. Brenda was with him. The two of them came up to me. I stood up.

"Oh Dylan!" I sobbed, "Brenda! This is so awful!"

I hugged Dylan, making sobbing sounds. Then I felt my fangs becoming extended. I let go of him quick, retracting my fangs, before anyone in the dimly lit Club noticed.

Now Brandon and Steve were beside us. They greeted the other two.

Brandon said, "I didn't think you'd get here this soon."

Dylan said, "What do you mean 'this soon'? We've been driving ever since Brenda told me about your e-mail."

"Driving?" Steve said, "From London?"

"No Steve." Brenda spoke with annoyance. "We weren't still in London. We were in Mexico. Puerto Vallarta."

Brandon and Steve both looked at me.

I said, "You were there too? So was I. What Hotel did you stay at?"

She said, "Hotel Playa Los Arcos."

I said, "I was at the Garza Blanca." That's about five miles south of the Playa Los Arcos. "I was with a guy."

Brandon told me, "You don't have to say more Val."

We spent the next hour or so catching up; engaging in small talk. David and Donna joined us. Everyone was reluctant to say anything about Kelly.

David informed Dylan and Brenda, "Our parents are taking care of the funeral arrangements."

We said no more about it that night.

Around 1:30 everyone decided that it was time to go. I was wide-awake. I told them I had to stay 'til closing.

Brandon said, "Then we'll see you at home, Val."

Then I spoke, "Before you go Dylan, there are some things about the business that I have to discuss with you. There are some people, who we'll have to meet with here, tomorrow night."

He said, "Can't you postpone it 'til after the funeral Valerie?"

"I can, but I don't know if you'll still be around."

He shrugged in his usual condescending way.

I spoke sharply. "You are my business partner Dylan! Whether you like it or not, Mr. Spoiled Rich Guy, you do have to occasionally show some interest!"

Dylan suddenly looked startled; so did Brenda, as did everyone else around the table. They were all staring at me, looking very distressed.

I said, "What's the matter?"

"Valerie." Steve told me, "You've got fangs. You're a vampire."

I said, "I'm not the one who killed Kelly! Wait for her to become undead. Then she'll tell you who really killed her, and that it wasn't me."

The others all stood up and backed away from the table.

I stood up and shouted, "I didn't kill Kelly!"

I rushed away from the table, made my way through the crowd, went into my office, and locked the door behind me.

I can't stay in here, I thought. My friends might be calling the police right now. I might be in a jail cell when the sun rises in a few hours. If the sunlight shines into my cell, I'll burn up into cinders, and go back to Hell. This time I'll be there to stay!

Or my friends might not wait for Kelly to revive. They might arrange for some Slayer to ram a stake through my heart, just to keep me from killing anybody.

I picked up my handbag, grabbed my jacket out of the closet, unlocked my office door, and stepped back out into the Club. Out on the floor, things were just as raucous as ever. My friends were still standing beside the table. They saw me, and I ran out the front door.

I heard Brandon call out, "Valerie! Come back! We have to talk!"

I rushed across the parking lot, got into my car and drove off.

"Talk"? Yeah--right. If you define the word talk, as ramming a sharp wooden stake through my heart.

I have to get home and pack, I thought, and be on the road out of L.A. before dawn gives me the rosy finger.

Get home? I wondered. I've been living at the Walsh house. Now that I'm a vampire, is it still my home? "The one place, where they have to let you in, no matter what"?

If I can no longer just walk in, I'd have to wait for Brandon or Brenda to show up and invite me in.

I thought, I have no place to go!

On the other hand, Brandon had said, "...see you at home, Val." That was an invitation, wasn't it?

What if they show up, while I'm still packing? What if the Police show up? What if Kelly doesn't revive?

Forget the "What ifs". I'll just have to pack my bags and be gone quick. What if I'm not quick enough? No! Forget the what ifs.

As I neared the Walsh house, a police car drove past me, with its lights flashing.

Forget about packing my bags.

I made a turn at the next corner, and headed for the nearest freeway.

I have to find a place where I can be safely indoors, before the sun rises, and stay there until sunset. Any cheap motel will do. They take cash. No questions asked, but would any of them have vacancies? At 1:45 on a Saturday morning? Forget about L.A. I should leave the City now. Leave for where? Where can I be indoors, before the sun rises in five hours?

In five hours, my picture's gonna be shown on every morning news broadcast in southern California. If there's a reward, what desk clerk at any motel, wouldn't be more than glad to cooperate with the Police?

A motel clerk in Sunnydale?

Right! I am a vampire on the run, and what better place to find refuge, than Vampire Town itself; and it's only a two hour drive from L.A. My stay there won't have to be permanent. Once Kelly becomes undead, she'll identify her real killer. Then, as long as I haven't killed anyone, I can work things out with everybody back in L.A.

And I won't have any reason to kill anyone, as long as I have those...

I forgot to take the six pack of pigs' blood, out of the fridge in my office in the AfterDark.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I do not own the character Inspector Columbo, who is owned by the producers of the TV Series "Columbo".

MrBillyD


	6. Chapter 6

6

Don't' panic. I thought, Just keep driving.

I kept driving. I got on the freeway, and was out of the City and on my way to Sunnydale, faster than I ever imagined. The best time to go anywhere on any freeway is at 2 in the morning. There's very little traffic then.

I reached the outskirts of Sunnydale, around 4 in the morning. I had another two and a half-hours to get safely inside, before sunrise. I drove along the two-lane highway, past the Sunnydale Motor Lodge. Its bright yellow "We Have Vacancies" sign was lit. I would have checked in then, but I was hungry, and I had to have some bottled blood to drink first. I drove on further.

I passed the Doublemeat Place, which was closed and dark, and drove on into Sunnydale itself. All the establishments along Main Street were closed and dark. I saw no pedestrians.

Harmony had given me a copy of the Vampire's Handbook, which had a long list of establishments, which cater to the undead. There were many in Sunnydale. Following the Handbook's instructions, I came to the intersection of Main Street and Whedon Street, turned right and drove on two blocks, until I came to a small flashing red neon sign saying "Willy's Place." I parked, and went inside.

Willy's place was a dive. A few thuggish looking characters were seated on the barstools. When I stepped inside, they all gave me an appraising look. I wondered if they were going to pounce. Then I displayed my fangs, and they lost all interest. I wasn't sure whether to be relieved or insulted.

I sat on one of the barstools, putting two empty seats between me and the closest customer to my right.

The guy behind the bar wore a nametag identifying him as "Willy".

He asked, "What're you having Miss?"

"You do serve blood, don't you?"

He asked, "Pig or human?"

"I'm new at being a vampire." I told him. "I don't want to have anything to do, with anybody's killing; so I'll have pigs blood."

"Right away Miss."

He gave me a large mug of warmed up blood.

The fellow two seats to my right said, "What do you mean you don't want to kill anybody? Sure you do. You're a vampire."

I told him, "I'm a vampire who owns a nightclub in L.A., and I want to avoid losing it all."

"Good enough."

Willy asked, "What nightclub is that?"

"The AfterDark. It's in Beverly Hills. We have live entertainment on the weekends."

"Yeah. I've heard of it." He chuckled, "But the Beverly Hills nightclub scene is way beyond my means. For entertainment here, that's it."

He pointed to a TV up on a shelf, at the end of the bar. The TV was tuned to what appeared to be a girls' volleyball game; but the girls had horns, and they were knocking another horned woman's head back and forth over the net, while dressed in only their sneakers.

Willy said, "That's the Demon Network, Channel 666. Wide World of Hellish Sports. Bet you don't have entertainment like that, at your establishment."

"No we don't." I admitted, "But we do have a giant screen TV. Just tell me how to arrange for a closed circuit hookup. I'm sure the AfterDark would be packed."

"For that," Willy said, "you don't want these girlie games. You'll want the Demon Gladiator Playoffs. I've got tapes of last year's Final Game, if you'd like to buy one, to see what you'd be getting."

"Sure. I never book any entertainers, without an audition."

Another guy at the bar spoke. He was around my age. He was kind of short, but unlike the others, there was nothing thuggish about him.

"That isn't the only entertainment in town." He told me, "We do have a nightclub here called the 'Bronze'. My name's Daniel Osborn. Everyone calls me Oz. I play guitar with the Band. We call ourselves 'Dingoes Ate My Baby'."

"Interesting name." I laughed. "If that's part of your act, I don't think Beverly Hills is ready for it." Then I told him, "I can't promise anything, but I will come in and listen to you, while I'm here."

I stayed a Willy's about a half-hour. Then I left and drove back to the edge of town. I managed to get a room at the Sunnydale Motor Lodge. When the sun rose that morning, I would be safely inside my room, with the blinds drawn.

At 5 AM, I turned on the room's TV. It also had access to the Demon Network, but I switched to the Early Morning News from L.A. Just as I'd expected, my picture was being shown, and I was described as "Suspected in the vampire killing of Miss Kelly Taylor, the night before last, outside the AfterDark Nightclub in Beverly Hills, which is owned by Miss Malone."

The reporter also stated, "In a surprising development, a reward of $100,000, for information leading to the apprehension of Miss Malone, is being posted by her own business partner, Mr. Dylan McKay. Mr. McKay is reported to have been romantically involved with the late Miss Kelly Taylor."

I thought $100,000? Maybe I should turn myself in and collect the reward. Then when Kelly revives undead, she'll tell everyone who killed her. I'll be off the hook and $100,000 richer. Then I can get my life back to normal or as close to normal as possible.

On the other hand, if Dylan doesn't want the AfterDark to have any involvement with the demon world, I can always look into investing, in this local nightclub called the Bronze.

Then the Anchorman said, "This just in. The body of Miss Kelly Taylor has reportedly disappeared from the Beverly Hills Mortuary, where she was being prepared for her funeral. According to employees, her body was there, when they locked up, a little after 11 o'clock last night. When the cleaning crew arrived, around 3 o'clock this morning, Miss Taylor's body was gone from her coffin."

Time to panic again!

I thought, Kelly won't be telling anyone who killed her! I'm still the chief suspect!

I'm trapped! I don't have enough time to find another place to hide, before sunrise. I'll be stuck in this room all day, until the sun goes down, a little after 6:30 PM! By then, one of those guys from Willy's place, or the desk clerk here, will have I.D'd me to the police, and collected the reward!

The police will have arrested me, and dragged me outside, where I'll have burned up in the daylight, and gone back to Hell! Gone directly to Hell. Will not have passed go. Will not have collected $100,000.

So repent you sinners.

No. Don't panic.

I reached in my handbag and took out the Vampire's Handbook. I looked up the number of Wolfram and Hart, picked up my cell phone and dialed Lindsey McDonald's extension. I got a recording, stating that Mr. McDonald would not be in until 9 AM. The time was now 5:12 AM.

I left a recorded message. "Hello Mr. McDonald. This is Valerie Malone. You may have seen my picture on the TV News. I'm the chief suspect in the vampire murder of Kelly Taylor. I'm going to need Wolfram and Hart's help, both legally and...other ways...I'm not sure what those other ways are."

I gave him my cell phone number and hung up. Then I waited.

About a half-hour later, my cell phone rang.

I spoke into it, "Hello. Who's calling?"

"Valerie. This is Dylan."

He was the last one I'd expected to hear from.

"Dylan!" I snapped at him. "What's this $100,000 reward? You don't know who the vampire was who killed Kelly! You've got no business accusing me!"

"That doesn't matter now." He told me, "Listen. Kelly's gone from the Funeral Home."

"Yeah. I know. I just saw it on the News."

"She's now a vampire. She's outside my door, and she wants me to let her in, before sunrise."


	7. Chapter 7

7

It was about 45 minutes before sunrise, on a Saturday morning. I was inside my room in the Sunnydale Motor Lodge, when I received that frantic call on my cell phone from Dylan McKay.

I asked him, "Why are you calling me about this?"

"You're the only other vampire I know Val. You might be able to give me some advice."

"Well," I told him, "If you don't want Kelly to burn up into cinders when the sun rises, you'll have to let her into your house."

"But she's now a hungry vampire. If I let her in, she might try to kill me for nourishment, or Brenda."

I said, "Then you or Brenda'll just have to ram a sharp wooden stake through her heart."

"Val, it's not a joke. I don't want to kill Kelly. Neither does Brenda."

"Yeah." I said, "That's a real toughie isn't it?"

"'A toughie'?" He shouted, "What are you, making a joke about it?"

"Dylan." I asked, "You wouldn't just happen to have a pint bottle of pigs' blood in your refrigerator, would you?"

"Pigs' blood? In my fridge? Val! Stop making jokes!"

"Okay. Listen carefully. There's a six-pack of bottled pigs' blood' in the fridge in my office in the AfterDark. You can drive on over there, pick them up, and if you leave now, you can be back to your place, and in time to feed Kelly, before sunrise."

"I can't drive over. If I step outside she'll pounce on me."

"Like I said, you got a real toughie there."

In the background, I heard Brenda's voice. I couldn't understand her words. Dylan said something inaudible to her. She said something to him. Then he spoke over the cell phone to me.

"Listen Val. Brenda says I should toss my keys out the window to Kelly, so she can drive on over herself."

"Good idea. Just one thing Dylan..."

His voice was away from the phone again. Then he didn't speak to me for a minute or so.

Then he said, "It's okay Val. I tossed my keys out the window. Kelly's just drove off in my car. She'll be able to get into the AfterDark, and get the pigs' blood. Things'll be okay."

He clicked off his phone before I could say, "No they won't Dylan."

About a half-hour later my cell phone rang again. I answered.

"Valerie." The caller said, "It's Dylan. I just got a call from Kelly. She's inside your office in the AfterDark, but your refrigerator is locked."

"I tried to warn you," I told him, "but you hung up. I locked the fridge so no one would find the pigs blood. I didn't want anyone to find out I was a vampire."

He said, "And I bet you're the only one who has the key."

"No." I told him, "There is a duplicate."

"And where's that?"

"I'm not telling."

"What kind of game is this?"

"I'm not telling anyone where it is, until you cancel the reward for my arrest."

"Okay. Consider it canceled."

"No Dylan. I know how you are. I'm not telling you where it is, 'til I hear it on the News, that you've canceled the reward."

Then I hung up.

Let them sweat, I thought, I can wait. I've got all day.

All day to do what? To be stuck here inside this motel room, on the outskirts of Sunnydale?

I could check out the action in the Demonic Gladiator Games video.

I had the video that I'd got from Willy in my handbag. I slid it into the player and switched the TV to channel 3. Then I played the video.

I watched the "Valhalla Games". I saw an armed battle on an athletic field, between two teams of warrior men and women, armed with swords, spears and shields, fighting to the death between two goal posts. It was a truly bloody massacre. They counted the number of people killed, and the number wounded, along with the goals, to reach the final score. When the game ended, the head of every dead player was impaled on a stake, and a losing team's cheerleader was hanging from the winning team's goal post; and she wasn't the only dead cheerleader, or fan.

Then the video jumped ahead a few hours, to show all the headless demon warriors rising up. They walked over to the stakes. Each one picked up his or her head, and put it back on. Then the hanged cheerleader was brought down. The noose was removed from her neck, and she got back up on her feet. Then all those who had been killed said good-night, and went on their way home.

Before this, I would have been revolted by the whole thing; but now, as a vampire, I loved every minute of it. I was sure that if we showed a live, closed circuit cable broadcast of this event, at the AfterDark, we could charge $1000 a pop, and the place would be packed.

The video had lasted about two and a half-hours. When it ended, the time was almost 9 o'clock. This was gonna be a very long day.

I again switched to the 24-hour news from L.A.

They repeated the same story about Kelly's disappearance, and that I was the chief suspect. They said nothing about the reward, but they also did not say that it had been canceled.

My phone rang.

"Val. It's Dylan. I just got a call from Kelly. She's still inside the AfterDark, but she's starving. She says she's ready to go outside and pounce on the first person she sees. I need to know where the duplicate key is now."

"And I need to hear a News report, that you canceled the reward. They didn't say a word about it."

"I told them Val."

Then I asked, "Has Kelly told you who killed her?"

"Yes. She says it was a vampire named Harmony."

"Yeah. I know her. They do not call her 'Harm' for nothing. I'm finally off the hook."

"No you aren't." He said, "This Harmony told Kelly, that you put her up to it."

Wouldn't you know it? I thought, I've just been through the very worst night, followed by the very worst morning, to top off the very worst week of my entire life!

I bellowed. "What do you mean I put her up to it?"

"Did you tell Harmony that you wished you could bite all of us except Donna, and the one you wanted to kill most was Kelly?"

I wondered if I should tell him that I wasn't being serious, but Harmony obviously thought that I was.

What I did say was, "I'm exercising my right against self incrimination."

"Go right ahead." He told me, "Kelly'll be exercising her right, to bring an indictment against Harmony, and you'll also be named in the indictment, as a co-conspirator."

"Wait Dylan. I'll make it up to her."

"How can you possibly do that?"

"Call her, and ask her if she'll be willing to forget any charge against me, if I help her get all the pigs' blood she'll ever need."

"You mean you'll tell her where the key is?"

"Dylan. There is no duplicate key."

"Then you can forget about her dropping the charges."

"You don't need any key!"

"What are you talking about?"

"You spoiled, pampered, Beverly Hills dilettantes, must be the only people in Los Angeles, who don't know that you can buy all the pigs' blood, that any vampire could possibly need, in every single butcher shop in the City"  
I hung up.

Now what? By now the desk clerk of this Motel, along with that guy named Oz, and all those other guys who'd seen me in Willy's Place, must have I.D'd me to the police. That Lieutenant Colombo's probably on his way here with an arrest warrant in his pocket.

I'm gonna need a Lawyer.

I looked through the Vampire's Handbook, and found Wolfram and Hart's number again. I picked up my cell phone and called them, dialing Lindsey McDonald's extension once more. The time was 9:10 AM. Now he was at work.

He said, "Good morning Miss Malone. I just heard your voice mail."

I told him, "And I've just heard from Dylan McKay. Kelly Taylor has revived as a vampire. She's accused Harmony of killing her, and Harmony accused me of putting her up to it."

Mr. McDonald said, "Don't worry about it Miss Malone. That's just hearsay. It won't be allowed in Court."

"Thank you for saying that," I told him, "But I'm sure it's not that easy for me to just walk away from the whole thing."

"No it isn't Miss Malone. If you want Wolfram and Hart's help, it's going to be very costly."

"I figured that." I asked, "Can you give me an estimate of the cost?"

"Your entire interest in the AfterDark Nightclub."

"My entire interest? So that's what this is all about huh? Right from the beginning? Even before Spike bit me?"

"Exactly. You have a choice Miss Malone. Sign over your entire interest in the AfterDark to us, and you can continue to exist as a creature of the night. If you refuse, you'll be burning up in the daylight, before the sun sets today."

I agreed to his terms. I am now a creature of the night. I am a resident of Sunnydale, where I am part owner of the Bronze Nightclub. We get live Wide World of Hellish Sports broadasts all the time; but so does everybody in Sunnydale, so we can't make money off it. I drink only pig's blood; except for when I go on hunting expeditions to Mexico, with Harmony.

There is a beach at Puerto Vallarta, which was originally named "La Playa de Los Muertos", that means "The Beach of the Dead." That's supposed to have come from a battle that was fought there almost 100 years ago. Then in the sixties, when the town became a popular tourist location, it was renamed "La Playa Del Sol", meaning "The Beach of the Sun". Now that Harmony and I have been there, people are going back to calling it "La Playa de Los Muertos."

I got a call from Kelly the other day. She told me that she only drinks pig's blood, like any responsible vampire; but she'd like to join Harmony and me on our next hunt.

The difference is that she wants to go hunting in Beverly Hills, for Dylan; for Brandon; for Brenda; for David and for Steve. She also said that Donna wants to join us in the hunt; so does Yolanda.

So repent you sinners.


End file.
